Like a lot of folks these days, I’ve been groomed to push
myself toward achievement in most areas of my life. It seems that, in the
current culture, it’s no longer cleanliness that we deem closest to Godliness;
it’s busy-ness.
If our Google calendars aren’t a veritable rainbow of appointments and
meetings, if we’re not constantly exhausted and worn down, we must be lazy or
falling behind somewhere.
Not only is this constant push toward over-doing affecting
adults, it’s clearly being transmitted to the next generation. When kids aren’t
at school, they’re at a sport’s practice, a tutoring session, a
club meeting, a study group gathering…Something
Of course, none of these things are negative on their own, but
when they’re all taken together, it raises the question: where is the time to
unwind? I’ve lost count of how many I work with who
have wearily told me their pages-long weekly schedule. I once let my young one lay down for because she had a fever, but still had
to get to a swimming lesson afterwards.
Savasana
(or “rest,” or “that part where we lay down”) needs to be their favorite
aspect. Yes, there are certainly members of the business crowd who
tiptoe out when the lights go dim, but I’ve come
to understand that for the lion’s share of working, savasana reigns supreme. And
rightly so! I often joke, “When else does someone let you to lay down
for 10 minutes?”
The thing is, if we let ourselves, we could do this at any time
(okay, maybe not during a meeting or in the produce department). I think the
key word here is “let.” When your teacher stands before you and tells you it’s
time to rest, you have just been given permission
to do so. You’re allowed. You are told that it is okay, in that moment, to
simply be.
As my personal practice has evolved with study, experience, and
age, I’ve come to fully embrace the extraordinary importance of giving myself
that kind of permission. This brings me to the point of this piece: I want to
empower everyone who reads this to grant themselves the time and space to step
back, unwind, and let themselves be.
I want all
of us to welcome the radical idea that living a full life and loving oneself
means allowing that time to chill. Give yourself permission to
stop taking calls and emails after work hours so you can sit outside and chat
with family. Allow yourself to take time to rest after meals. Grant yourself
the mental space to put aside a stressful situation and deal with it when you
have the time and energy to process. You are allowed to skip the gym after a
long day. It’s okay to say “no” to a project or a social engagement solely on
the basis of not feeling like it.
Forgo a utilitarian shower in the morning for
a leisurely bath in the evening. Accept that, every once in awhile, you can let
someone else do the cooking. Embrace the relaxed feeling of sitting to read or making tea first thing in the morning, before gazing into the light
of your phone. Take a bike ride without anywhere to go. Unplug for an
entire weekend so you can read a book cover to cover. Leave space in your
agenda for doing nothing, and don’t feel guilty about it. We have such precious few moments on this earth, ask yourself if
all of this time consuming chatter is serving your self or your purpose here.
If nothing else, I implore you to ask yourself: what is this
lifestyle teaching your children, our children? From where I sit, it seems the
lesson is that our value as people is directly tied to your obligations. Grace,
humility, presence of mind—none of these matter if you’re not running yourself
ragged. This notion has become so ingrained that we don’t even realize it’s
happening.
Ask yourself, when is the
last time you (or your child) had an entire weekend without commitments? When
is the last time you took a nap, or a bath? These are important activities for
nurturing the body, the mind, the spirit. It’s no secret how deeply healing mindfulness
is. But is it even possible to be mindful when you’re living in a
never-ending whirlwind of commitment?
So please dear reader,
give yourself—and your children—permission to rest J
Not sure of the origin of this, however it was sent via e-mail from a very dear friend - AC
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